Cell Phone Kiosks in the Mall

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Cell Phone Kiosks in the Mall

Okay, I can't stand malls to begin with, but the 100's of cell phone kiosks make the mall UNBEARABLE. I almost fucking lost my mind yesterday. I was starving and couldn't think of anything good to eat, so I decided to go to the mall because I thought there was a Sbarro and I wanted some baked ziti (mmmmm...baked ziti...).

Enter the mall, immediately happen upon cell phone kiosk #1. Accidently make eye contact with a sales person and am immediately bombarded with sales pitch after sales pitch. I'm not even standing within close proximity to the stupid booth and this guy is shouting at me. Now, if that wasn't bad enough, there are close to 20 of these stupid cell phone kiosks all over the mall and they are all yelling at people like carnies! "Excuse me miss...", "Who do you have cell service with...", "Where did you get that belt buckle, wanna buy a phone...", "Christmas is coming up, you should buy phones for your family...", "HEY...". Keep in mind that I am NOT shopping for a cell phone, I'm nowhere near the kiosk and I'm avoiding eye contact with all of these sales people (I thought that would help...) and they continue to yell at me as I'm walking down the mall. So to all you mall cell phone salespeople:

I'M SHOPPING FOR BAKED ZITI YOU STUPID FUCK AND WHY THE HELL WOULD I NOT ALREADY HAVE A GOD DAMN CELL PHONE!!

p.s. BTW, there wasn't a Sbarro in that mall any more and after all that I left the mall empty handed, a grumble in my tummy and visions of strangling people with cell phone power cords...

2 Shenanigans:

At 12/27/2004 2:47 PM, Mad Mikey had the nerve to say...: I usually just hold up my cell phone and say "Thanks, I got one...." and walk away.
At 5/10/2008 8:30 PM, Anonymous had the nerve to say...: Cellphone Sales is big business. I do not have college degree and my jumpshot sucks. But I can make anyone do anything I want if you give me 10 seconds of your time. 10 years ago as a "mall phone sales rep" I made 90k a year. Every year after that my income slowly vanished. Last year I made 58k. The reason behind this is that cellphone companies are paying less and less every year even though sales increase. Also just about anyone with a heartbeat get a job nowadays. Before you had to be atleast sexy. Anyways with sales floors being flooded with clowns and so called saleman and pay decreasing envokes an aggressive greeting enviroment. So "Thanks, I got one" will not work. You might get a response like which one do you have or get a new blackberry you need etc...etc.
Things will make a cellphone salesman ignore you are if you are a religiuos freak ie jehovah's witness, hard core preaching christian or if you are one of those Primerica guys or if you come around with a business dream of us selling xs energy drink.
And that is the inside scoop. PS this will not work on a really good salesman. Don't worry they are hard to find nowadays.