Summer's Shenanigans

Have you seen my Kuta?

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Overwhelming...

So I just finished my taxes and said goodbye to the thousands of dollars I saved over the last year. I think my business has grown to the point that I can't keep doing this accounting stuff by myself because I feel totally overwhelmed right now. Half way through my taxes I started guessing, estimating and hoping I don't get audited. I just wish I knew more about how this whole hiring an accountant thing works. Or at least how it would work with my unique and rapidly growing business. Do you pay them monthly, hourly, what the hell do the do exactly? Will they save me money? Is it worth it? Is my brain going to expode if I think about this any more?!

Blah.

Sunday, February 19, 2006

SUV Tax Loophole

Since you asked, Robin, here is the loophole on getting a $25K write off by buying a vehicle that weighs over 6000lbs:

"A 1997 provision in the U.S. tax code (Section 179) provided small businesses with a tax write-off of up to $25,000 for a vehicle weighing more than 6,000 pounds- used 50% of the time for work purposes. The original intent behind this provision was to encourage investments in pickup trucks, minivans, and other needed service vehicles. A far smaller incentive was provided for cars—less than $7,000 over two years.

The explosion of SUV, pickup, and minivan sales in America’s passenger vehicle fleet has turned this small business benefit into a massive loophole in the tax law. Currently, 38 different passenger SUVs including the Lincoln Navigator, which nets a combined 15 miles per gallon according to the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), the Cadillac Escalade (16 mpg), the BMW X5 (18 mpg), the Mercedes-Benz ML55 (16 mpg), and the notorious Hummer H2 (estimated 11 mpg) all weigh more than 6,000 pounds. This loophole allows some of the least fuel-efficient passenger vehicles on the road today to qualify for a significant tax break.

In 2003, the Bush administration proposed increasing the tax deduction to $75,000. Lawmakers responded by expanding it to a whopping $100,000 as part of the $350 million tax cut package. Yet Congress did not change the weight-based classification of the vehicles, creating a huge benefit for the largest, least efficient vehicles.

Accountants, SUV dealers rush to capitalize
Around the country, auto dealers such as 'the Car Guy' Jerry Reynolds in Texas and hundreds of accountants and online tax management sites have been encouraging small business owners such as doctors, lawyers, and realtors to rush out and take advantage of this tax windfall. One advertisement from Dugan & Lopatka, an accounting firm in Wheaton, IL, reads, 'Write-Off 100% of Your New SUV? Yes, If It’s Under 100,000!'

According to a November 7, 2003, article in the Washington Post, Dugan & Lopatka were so inundated with phone calls regarding their advertisement they nearly had to shut down their switchboard. Industry analysts predicted a spike in purchases last November and December due to the typical year-end rush to claim the deduction for tax returns.

Senators push for closure of loophole
Several proposals have been offered to fix the loophole, at one point, the Senate Finance Committee staff actually proposed raising the weight limit to 14,000 pounds, enough to disqualify even the Hummer. Bills introduced by Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA) and Representative Anna Eshoo (D-CA) would take a different approach to closing the SUV tax loophole. In The SUV Business Tax Loophole Closure Act, they propose that SUVs weighing 6,000 pounds or more simply be reclassified as cars under the tax code.

In October 2004, after the House Ways and Means Committee approved a three-year extension of the $100,000 loophole, a House-Senate conference committee negotiated a roll back in the deduction to its original amount of $25,000 as part of the larger Corporate Tax Bill. While tightening this loophole is certainly noteworthy, it is by no means the end of significant tax breaks for gas-guzzling SUVs. According to an analysis in the Detroit News, besides the $25,000 basic equipment deduction, SUVs will still qualify for "bonus depreciation," an added write off of 30 percent of the purchase price above $25,000. Beyond that, additional costs can be deducted according to regular depreciation rules, or 20 percent in the first year. For example, a business owner purchasing a Hummer H1, with a sticker price of $106,185, would be able to deduct $60,722 in the first year under the revised rules: a $25,000 equipment deduction, $24,356 in bonus depreciation, and $11,366 in regular depreciation."

Source

Now, what I need to find out is if the BMW X5 really does qualify. The article above claims it does, but the BMW website states that the "curb weight" of the X5 is 5,000LBS, but the towing capacity is 6,000LBS and someone told he that they heard that the above write off applies to actual towing capacity of 6,000LBS +. Are there any tax accountants in the house?!

Tax loops holes, Paris Hiltons boob and sissy boys in ruffly panties...only a mix you'll find at Summer's Shenanigans...haha

Time for a new car

I live a fairly simple life. I drive a '99 Ford Mustang that I paid off years ago, I have no debt and I could easily live off of $1000 or so a month. (Luckly, I make more then $1000 a month, so I can do fun stuff like traveling, shopping and fine dining, but that's not my point ;)...). My point is that I prefer to live frugally, I hate having debt and financial obligations. Unfortunately, I have come to the realization that if I live simply and save a bunch of money, guess what happens?! I HAVE TO SEND EVERY LAST CENT I HAVE SAVED ALL YEAR TO THE MOTHER FUCKING GOVERNMENT!!!!! That's right. The government will be $18,000 richer this year because I have been frugal.

For almost all of 2005 I have agonized over wanting a BMW X5. When it came down to it, I figured that it would not be a responsible decision since I havn't saved enough to pay cash and I would have to get a car loan, etc, etc. Come to find out, if I had purchased an X5 in 2005, I would have received a $25,000 tax deduction and would not have had to pay a single cent to the government for last years income. WTF?!?!?! Yeah, no shit.

SO, guess what I'm buying myself for my birthday this year? A B-M-fucking-W. Now, here lies the problem. My boyfriend bought my dream car last year, which sucks. Stefan was looking for a mid-sized SUV and was looking at the Volvo XC90. He test drove the Volvo and didn't love it, I mentioned how awesome the BMW X5 was and he test drove one and loved it, so he bought a super sick BMW X5 4.6L V8 BadAss Driving Machine. So now he owns the top of the line BMW X5 in black.



Not only does he own the car I want, but he owns it in the color I want. It would be incredibly stupid to me to buy the exact same car as Stefan, but I LOVE the X5. I have searched high and low and can not find ANY other car I would prefer to have. The only solution that I can come up with is to get a different color (even though owning the same car sounds silly to me...). So this is what I'm thinking:

I think I want a white BMW X5 4.4L V8 with light leather interior, all-around tinted windows, navigation, iPod hook up and 22" white rims. Sort of like this (but with white rims, instead of chrome):



What do ya think? Too ghetto? Any other suggestions on mid-sized SUV's? Help!

I See London, I See France...

I see Paris Hiltons boobie prance (right out of her shirt...)

Now, really, it's not breaking news or even interesting that Paris Hilton's boob made another public appearance. But, I did think the angry fat lady, glaring at Paris in the background and Stavros Niarcho's head apparently glued to Paris Hilton's shoulder was mildly amusing...

Friday, February 10, 2006

I Get Some Pretty Interesting Emails....

Like this email that I received today...

"Hi, I just luv these ruffled sissy panties. The bikini style is so sexy. Pink is my favorite color, too. I wonder if they'll fit me, though. I am a sissy-boy with a 37 in. waist and a small thingie. I want to be sure I don't fall out of the leg openings but I need just enough room for my little bulge. Will these panties work for me? Are there ruffles across the rear? What material are they? They are just so precious. I'm sure any boy would feel feminine and girly wearing these sweet panties. Do you sell many of these to boys? Just curious. Thank you, sissy Debbie"

Here's to Sissy Debbie's "small thingy". Lets all hope it doesn't fall out of these pink ruffly panties...

Pink is Awesome

And no, I'm like totally not even talking about just the color...Pink the singer, silly. Teehee...

Seriously though, what a hilarious video.

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Thursday, February 09, 2006

Best Advice Ever

Okay, I have to admit, sometimes my brother says some pretty smart stuff:

"Don't determine your career path strictly based on how much money (you think) you can make! It doesn't matter what you do, just do something you love. If you find something you truly love to do, you will excel and succeed because you WANT to do it. If you are the best janitor on earth, you will make more than a mediocre brain surgeon."

This may seem simple, but it's amazing how many people will make themselves miserable for a lifetime just to make some money...I'm am still completely floored that following that very advice has led to my success. I did not get into online retail/fashion because I thought I would make a lot of money. My goal was to do something I enjoyed and guess what? I'm making crazy money AND I'm happy.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Practical Jokes

I was thinking about all the practical jokes I used to play on the managers at Geico (when I worked there), so I figured I would let you all in on some really good practical jokes.


Make Them the Laughing Stock of the Freeway:

Supplies: You wll need a phillips head screwdriver and a really really gay license plate frame (I used a hot pink leopard pink license plate frame that said, "Treat me like the princess I am".

Mission: Find your targets car, unscrew their current license plate frame and screw on a pretty princess frame in it's place.

Goal: Your target will drive around for days wondering why everyone is laughing and pointing at them on the freeway.


Make Them the Laughing Stock of the Parking Lot:

Supplies: You will need a huge bag of styrafoam packing peanuts and your target will have to drive a convertible car.

Mission: Wait until a beautiful sunny day, when your target decides to leave their convertible parked with the top down. Dump the entire bag into the car until it is completely full of packing peanuts.

Goal: Your target will have to spend a good hour trying to scoop all of those stupid styrafoam peanuts out of their car. Be sure not to leave the bag the packing peanuts came in, so they will have to find something big enough to put them all in.


Mess Up Their Cubicle:

Supplies: You will need a can of Barbasol shaving cream (shaving gel will not work), a freezer and a can opener.

Mission: Put the shaving cream in the freezer for at least 4 hours. Remove the bottom of the can with a can opener. Stash the can in your targets desk drawer and make sure you are long gone. In about an hour the shaving cream will begin to thaw and expand into a HUGE foamy mess.

Goal: This will make a huge mess of your targets cubicle. This is also a good way to get fired if you get caught ;)...

I have more practical jokes up my sleeve, but I will let you in on some more at a later date. I have to get back to my taxes....YUCK!!!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

I'm feeling so "Emo"...

Okay, maybe not...But I do think it's funny when people describe themselves as: emo, punk, gothic, preppy, etc. I just can't imagine trying that hard to fit into a category. Back to being "emo"...does any one else think it would be a pain in the ass, dying your hair black and then brushing it into your left eye? Maybe it's just me...

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Kevin Federline - Tool

Well, I wrote about Kevin Federline the "rapper". But after seeing the following video, I think I'm going to have to change his offical title to "Tool".

The song playing in the background is Popozao, and as I mentioned before, K-Fool raps for a total of 24 seconds during the entire 3.5 minute song. Um, why does he look confused about the lyrics? It really looks like he has no idea what the words actually are or when he's supposed to start lip synching. My dream concert is definately Kevin Federline opening for Paris Hilton, followed up by Carmen Electra (did you know Carmen put out a rap album a while back? It's even worse then you would ever imagine...)