Summer's Shenanigans

When ever I ask someone what kind of music they like, the answer is always, "I like everything!". Have you ever noticed that? Well, I've found a way to prove just how eclectic your musical taste really is. Take your iPod, put it on shuffle and list the first 10 songs that pop up. Here are mine:

* "The KKK Took My Baby Away" by NOFX & Johnny Ramone
* "Slither" by Velvet Revolver
* "Stand by Me" by Ray Charles
* "Bubble Pop Electric" by Gwen Stefani
* "Latin Girls" by Black Eyed Peas
* "Shiver" by Maroon 5
* "I Close My Eyes" by DJ Liquid
* "Smoke Two Joints" by Bob Marley
* "I'll Be Home For Christmas" by Bing Crosby (haha)
* "Ride the Lightening" by Metallica

And, NO cheating. List the first 10 songs that actually come up :)!

I received this Survival Kit in a Sardine Can a couple of Christmas's ago and it ended in up in "the drawer", you know the drawer that everyone has that all things random go into. I came across it again when I was packing for Puerto Rico and decided to throw it in with my luggage. The kit contains:

* Fish hook and line
* Compass
* First aid supplies
* Duct tape
* Matches
* Whistle
* Signal mirror
* Razor blade
* Fire starter cube
* Safety Pin
* Salt
* Tootsie Roll
* Paper
* Pencil
* Paper clip
* Tea bag
* Sugar
* Gum
* Waterproof bag

Everything that MacGyver would ever need, all wrapped up in a sardine can that can be used to cook food in, drink out of, etc!

Not that we were roughing it, but we really did get quite a bit of use out of it. We ended up using the matches, first aid supplies, safety pin, salt, Tootsie Roll, sugar and gum. It was also nice that they put a razor blade and mirror in there in case you can't find a place to do your cocaine.

This is a great item to have if your into hiking/camping/traveling or it would be great to throw in your car/boat/RV, etc. You can pick up one of these babies at RedEnvelope.com for $7.99.

I am SO sick of girls piss-poor excuses for wanting/getting a boob job. Just fucking admit it! You want big, fake tits because you want guys to look at you!

So, here are my Top 5 Stupidest Excuses for Getting a Boob Job:

"Getting a boob job will make me feel better about myself." - Oh yes, big ol titties are going to really help your self esteem. If anything it's going to warp it even more. People staring at your faux boobs, don't like you anymore then before you had weird boobs.

"My body isn't in proportion." - What do you mean, your body isn't in proportion? WTF? Are your feet so small that you fall over when you try to walk? If your arms were not "proportionate" to your legs, would you get arm enlargements?! A very small percentage of human being have perfectly porportionate bodies, so please, find another excuse.

"Clothes with fit me better if my boobs are bigger" - Please tell me you're kidding, with this one. Please!! I can tell you from personal and professional experiance that womens clothing in the USA best fits a B cup OR SMALLER.

"I'm getting breast implants so I can hide my insulin pump in my cleavage" - I actually heard this excuse on the TV show "Dr. 90210". Does any one believe that you are enlarging your boobs JUST so you can hide your insulin pump between them. Why don't you just gain 50 pounds and hide it between a roll of fat?

"I'm getting my boobs done to further my modeling career." - If you need fake tits to further your modeling career, you were never a real model to begin with. Just admit that you're not pretty enough to be a model and move on.

My whole point is this: Don't make up some lame excuse as to why you "need" fake tits, just admit that you are a vain mo-fo that needs self-reassurance through random people thinking that you are superior because you bought yourself big ol' fake boobies. (By the way, people don't think your superior, they just think your kinda trashy). Yes, more seedy guys will try to fondle you and perhaps they will even try to hump you. Not because they think you are a great person, but because you have big trashy fake tits. $5,000 well spent if you ask me!

Labels: Boobs

The rhinestone initial F belt buckle that I carry in one of my stores, is going to be playing a big part in an upcoming episode of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation" (a very popular TV show on CBS)!

I just got a call from the Prop Master of CSI, Michael Lindsay, and our buckle is going to be adorning a purse of a killer. The best part is that the impression of the buckle on the victim is what leads to the killer arrest. Pretty funny since I love CSI! I'm going to try and get a copy of the episode so I can post a clip showing the buckle :).

Today I was making banners for the Halloween season and I had the bright idea to make my 1st ever animated gif. How hard could it be, right? Well, way too much tinkering and a couple of hours later, TADA!!!!

My very 1st animated GIF. I made it in Fireworks and now I have a headache. The end.

Just when I start to think that I'm getting old, I get carded for a lottery ticket. The clerk didn't just ask if I was old enough, he asked to see my ID and looked shocked when I told him I was 28. Keep in mind that legal age to play the lottery is 18!

That's the last time I go to the convenience store for candy and a lottery ticket wearing this outfit! ;)

I've been in Puerto Rico for the past 4 days and I already found my dream house :)! It's unfinished, but that is what we want so that we can finish it to exactly how we want it. Stefan and I put an offer of $250,000 in and it looks like we'll get it for about that.


This house is in Rincon, Puerto Rico and sits on over 2 acres with a stream running through it, lush foliage and HUGE mango trees. This house is also 5 minutes from the beach and world-class surf. The house is two stories with a huge living room, two bedrooms, a bathroom and a kitchen on the 1st floor. The 2nd floor has a large main room and 4 smaller rooms, which will be perfect for our offices, server room and gym. It will take $40,000 to finish the house, but finished it will still be only $300k. Not bad for living in a tropical paradise....