Summer's Shenanigans

I used to "complain" about Stefan befriending all of my friends and hanging out/surfing with them more often then I did. Now that Stefan and I have moved to Puerto Rico, apparently our separate groups of friends have all become pretty close and are hanging out without Stefan and I around!!! What the hell? Those are MY friends, damn it!

(Names in pink = Summer's friends, names in blue = Stefan's friends)

I feel so out of the loop ;)!

When The Smythe and Josh get married, I hope that they remember that it was Stefan and I that brought them together...

Labels: Friends, Funny

Wired Magazine is having a contest that requires you to destroy your most hated gadget and submit the photographic proof.



The funny thing is that this was brought to my attention (thanks Conner ;)...), just as I was contemplating smashing my new Lexmark printer ala "Office Space". At least now I have an extra excuse to destroy this POS...

Details to follow, but fireworks are legal in Puerto Rico. I might try and get this bitch airborn...

Labels: Computers, Fun, Funny, Technology, Weird

You would think that someone that practically lives in a nightclub, would at least have some sort of game when it comes to bustin' a move...No? No...

Paris HIlton was judging the Miss Turkey pageant when one of the contestants pulled Paris on stage for an impromptu dance:

{ Warning: The following video is awkwardly painful to watch }



Seriously? If I made a living off of hanging out in night clubs, I would spend a little of daddy's money on some dance lessons so I don't look like a drunken arthritic chicken on the dance floor.

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, Videos

When I 1st saw this "Peep show" photo, i thought it was hilarious! Then I got to thinking, "who has this much time on their hands?!" I was envisioning someone that is either SUPER stoned or perhaps someone on a 3 day meth and/or Adderall binge...

Hysterical, nonetheless ;).

Labels: Fun, Funny

So maybe I'm a day late, but here are some funny Easter cartoons:

:D

Labels: Fun, Funny, Holidays

When we found our little kitten (Chichieto, or Cheech for short), he was only 4 to 4.5 weeks old, which is almost too young to be away from his mommy. But, he was abandoned, so we didn't have any choice. One of the funny things the he developed is his love for our fuzzy, cheetah print blanket. He immediately took to it and whenever he sees it, he can't help but run over to it, gently grab it in his mouth and start nursing on it. He usually does this for about an hour or until he falls asleep (with the blanket still in his mouth).



He got a little nervous when I shot this video of him, but normally, he is going off with the kneading and he purrs like crazy. It's obviously soothing to him, sort of like when a kid sucks it's thumb. So cute!

Labels: Animals, Cats, Funny, Videos

I bought a bunch of great stocking stuffers for Christmas this year, but unfortunately I didn't make it home to stuff them in my friends/family members stockings. And by "great stocking stuffers", I mean totally bizarre things that will probably make you hate me for stuffing your stocking with said items...

Conner and Dianne (Van the Man's parents) were visiting us in Puerto Rico, when my package of extra awesome stocking stuffers arrived. Conner was nice enough to be my guinea pig and test out a couple of the items...Like these Crick-ettes!

The good news is that the whole pack is only 9 calories and they come in three yummy flavors: salt and vinegar, cheese and bacon and sour cream and onion! The bad news is that they are actually dead crickets. Yum?

Conner said they didn't taste bad at all. I guess I'll have to find something grosser for his Christmas stocking next year...

Labels: Funny, Gifts, Weird

Jump the shark: Phrase coined in 1997 to describe a defining moment at which a favorite television show has reached its peak, and can only subsequently decline; also describes the moment of decline for any pop culture reference. The phrase, used during the late 1980s, refers to the actual moment in the ABC series Happy Days when the character Fonzie went water skiing and literally "jumped the shark."

Just yesterday, I was snooping around TheSuperficial.com and was checking out their official business site Anti Clown Media. This is something I always do when I find a website that I like, that has a successful web presence. I was checking out their advertising info and specifically though that this part was hilarious:

"...We believe in connecting special marketers with a special audience. Are you in the business of scamming people with a free iPod gimmick? Then shoot yourself in the face and never come back here ever again. Anticlown Media only accepts advertisers that complement our sites..."

I thought that this was particularly funny, since I've recently sworn off of myspace, because of their ridiculously obnoxious talking iphone and ipod gimmick ads.

So, I was catching up on my trashy celebrity gossip on The Superficial today and guess what I saw! A large, gimmicky ipod scam advertisement. Ha.

What a bunch of hypocritical tools...

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, Geeky Stuff

I don't care what anyone says, this is elfin' hilarious!

As much as I wanted to be all Scroogy and hate it, elfing Stefan, Kuta, Shawn and myself made me laugh...Click on the picture to see us dance! :)

Thanks for the tip, Michael!

Labels: Family, Fun, Funny, Weird

I was just talking to Kim and Lindsay about how glad I am that digital cameras and the internet were not very popular when I was really young and doing crazy things...



Although, these ladies look old enough to know better. Hmmmm.

I wonder what boob painters get paid? That might be a funny job....haha

Labels: Funny, Weird

One of the girls that works for me just made a special request:

"Summer, can you put in the Eazy E CD, I think it will be good for employee moral..."

So, of course, we're rocking out to Eazy E now. LaLaLingerie.com is soooo gansta today...haha.

Labels: Business, Funny, Music

Here is a hilarious spoof of Britney Spears' big come back performance. I find it especially funny because I was just talking to someone about how over medicated America is today...haha



Is it bad that the guy (Greg Scarnici) that spoofed Britney has a way nicer body then her?!

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, Videos

The song "Dick in a Box" just won an Emmy:

The song was actually made as a Saturday Night Live skit, which is so so so funny, but it's almost as funny that it won a serious music award. "Dick in a Box" won a Creative Arts Emmy for Outstanding Original Music And Lyrics. Awesome...haha.

The music and lyrics of "Dick in a Box" are by Justin Timberlake (music & lyrics), Jorma Taccone (music & lyrics), Katreese Barnes (music), Asa Taccone (music), Akiva Schaffer (lyrics), Andy Samberg (lyrics).

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, Videos

I was shopping at the local supermarket in Rincon today and came across Pooh's Pirate Adventures:

I think Disney might want to rethink dressing up Pooh as a pirate...(Or maybe I'm just immature...haha)

Labels: Funny

I think beauty pageants are pretty ridiculous to begin with, but this is pretty hilarious. At the Miss Teen USA Pageant, Miss South Carolina, Lauren Caitlin, was asked the following question:

"A recent poll showed that 1/5th of Americans can't find the USA on a world map and why do you think this is?"

And her amazing answer:


Lauren Caitlins answer: "I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhmm, some people out there in our nation don't have maps and uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as uh, South Africa, and uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, uhhh, our education over here in the US should help the U.S., umh, should help South Africa, it should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future, for us."

The only sentance that I can decipher is: "I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uhm, some people out there in our nation don't have maps." Although it's not a very good sentance, or answer for that matter, she would have been better off stopping right there...

Even better? Miss South Carolina placed in the Miss Teen USA contest after that stellar answer.

Speaking of "beauty pageants", what the hell is up with them anyways? It's more like a contest of who can get the most plastic surgery and who can pretend the most convincingly that they give a shit about global warming or even know what they are talking about (see above quote). I especially like how you can not be Miss America if you have children or are married, but you can go get a nose job and breast implants. It sounds like Donald Trump and his partners (the owners of the Miss America Pageant) made up the Miss America criteria in order to parade around a bunch of pretty, available women for them to choose from.

I can see it now, a bunch of ugly rich men sitting around talking: "Let's see, how can we get hot chicks to hang out with us? How about we spend a bunch of money on a lavish pageant where the criteria for entry is open only to beautiful, young, unmarried women. *laughing* That will totally work, Donald. Chicks are suckers for that shit. Make sure you throw in the rules that they can't have kids or an abortion either, I don't want to bang a slut. Also make it clear that we're okay with plastic surgery. Can we sneak something in there about requiring breast implants? No? Okay, good enough..."

Edit: After watching the video of Miss South Carolina again, did anyone else notice that Mario Lopez did her a favor by cutting her off? Haha...Nice move. Mario is a pro. :)

Labels: Funny, Videos

Stefan took this photo of Kuta as he was managing the excavation of the PR property.

I love my boy. You couldn't ask for a better dog/partner in crime. He really is amazing once you actually get to know him (you'll hate him if you're not a "dog person". He's way too smart and protective of me, but that suits me just fine :) ).

Labels: Animals, Dogs, Funny, Kuta

I took Monkey to the vet today and her butt problem was exactly what I thought (gotta love the internet). Her anal sacs were full, which gives dogs a very uncomfortable feeling. Victor the vet tech, did the honors of putting his finger up her butt to "express" her anal gland ($20, well spent...) and even he seemed a bit grossed out when he was explaining to me that Monkey's sacs "were very full".

The vet also gave me a perscription for anal cream and I'm supposed to "apply a thin layer to rectal area twice daily for 10 days". WHAT? They didn't even give me any rubber gloves to go with the Monkey anal cream. Christ.

Stefan, I am Fex Ex-ing Monkey and her anal cream to you. She's YOUR dog, you know...(she's only our dog when she does cute stuff...).

Anal cream. Are you f-ing kidding me?!

Labels: Animals, Dogs, Funny, Health, Monkey

Go 'head girl, get your freak on...

Labels: Animals, Funny, Videos, Weird

There is no work service today so I decided to catch up on my domestic duties. I shaved and washed Kuta:

That may not seem like a big task, but it took over an hour just to shave him. My dog has a lot of surface area! Then when I washed him, I got attacked by ants. Apparently they failed to complete their ark before I flooded their world...

I shaved an entire trash bag full of Kuta's hair off of him and he is so much happier now (it's been very hot). As I was cleaning up his hair, I thought I would recycle some of it and I made Monkey a toupe. She looks like a suave Albert Einstein!

Labels: Animals, Dogs, Funny

Someone (I think it was my mom?) sent me these cool photos of fish painted on this couples faces:






Either these people are very creative (and have a lot of time on their hands) or they've been tripping on acid for a week straight...You decide. ;)

Labels: Animals, Art, Funny, Weird

While I was in Puerto Rico, Kuta went to stay at Rancho Robin (my moms house) and he just returned home today. We all know how much Kuta loves to roll in the dirt after bathing, but he like to kick it up a notch while at my moms ranch. Kutas favorite pass time at Rancho Robin consists of jumping into the horses water trough and then roll around in horse poop....FUN! Kuta knows that getting wet first really makes the horse crap stick to him for a long lasting Eau de Crap...He's so smart!

Kuta smells like poop.

Labels: Animals, Dogs, Funny, Horses

Here are the Mac versus PC commercials that are really, SO funny. Unless you own a PC and then you're just pissed...;)


















This Mac commercial is pretty hilarious too :D!

Labels: Funny, Macintosh, Technology

Once upon a time there was a dog named Monkey. Monkey gets very nervous when riding in the car. Can't you tell?!

Actually, Monkey's two favorite things are riding in the car and sleeping. Wait, actually I think sleeping and farting tie for 2nd place on Monkey's favorite things to do list.

I snapped this picture of Monkey sleeping during a car ride to Mexico. And, yes, she was farting too. I think Stefan and I invented a new game called, "Who Can Roll Their Window Down Quicker"....

Labels: Animals, Dogs, Funny, Monkey

What is the drinking age in Costa Rica? As long as you can see over the counter and have a few bucks, you're old enough to buy alcohol. :)

Although I always tell people that as long as you can see over the counter, you can buy beer in Costa Rica, it was still funny to see this little 8 year old girl buying two cans of Imperial beer at the supermercado. I snapped this picture last time Stefan and I were in Costa. And yes, we were buying Imperial too :).

Labels: Costa Rica, Funny, Traveling

Stefan and I hard at work today...

I was making fun of Stefan's Macdonalds drive-thru head set, so he snapped this picture.

Labels: Funny

I don't know how Bulbboy always has the perfect link for every situation, but he sent me to the video below after I was having a major IBM/Windows hate-fest.

I have to say, Eddie Izzard is pretty hilarious. Maybe it's just because I can relate to his control-p-print issue after being forced into Windows use...

Labels: Funny, Videos

See! I told you Bill Gates was a criminal!!

Okay maybe this mugshot of Bill Gates was taken a few years ago (30 years, ago actually), but still...

How stoked does Bill Gates look to be going to jail though. He is pumped! Look at that million billion dollar smile. :D

Bill Gates was arrested by the Albuquerque, New Mexico police in 1977 after a traffic violation, details of which have been "lost" over time. I wonder if Bill paid someone off to "lose" his record...

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, The Justice System

Stefan and I were wandering around the gift shop in the Atlanta, Georgia airport during an extended layover, when I spotted this magnet:

Why do I look so confused you ask? Atlanta isn't exactly known for their panda bears. Probably because there are no pandas in Atlanta...

They must have gotten a REALLY good deal on these magnets.

Labels: Animals, Funny, Traveling, Weird

I just got the following email from someone that I do not know:

"hi how are u? are u married? do u like to have sex. iwhat is your phone number. what is your name please write back from shimon"

Isn't that romantic? I just want to rip my clothes off and throw myself at Shimon!

Labels: Funny, Weird

Okay, this is really, really, really funny. This skit is from Saturday Night Live and features Justin Timberlake and Andy Samberg:

I normally try not to steal posts from other blogs, but this one is so funny that I had to steal it from Julien. :D

Labels: Funny, Videos

Today I was dragging in inventory shipments and I noticed a mystery box. Yes, I am so anal that I know exactly how many shipment are to arrive on each specific day, and this day there was an extra box. I recognized the vendor on the return address label, so I figured it was their 2007 catalogs or something like that. I tore it open and read the accompanying letter:

Dear Valued Customer,

Like a good standing wine, our business improves over time~!

We understand that we may have caused you undue frustration this year in shipping woes.

This holiday, we wish to show you our appreciation for your business and your patience as we continue to grow, by offering you this bottle of wine...

My 1st thought was that it was a nice gesture, since I have indeed suffered some serious bang-my-head-against-the-wall moments due to this company's lack of professionalism. But, my inner Cinical Summer, thought, "Yeah, right. It's probably a bottle of Charles Shaw." Low and behold...

I must be psychic.

So, I spent $100,000 with this company in 2006. Their "customer service" agents are complete bitches 75% of the time (until I dropped the name of the owner of the company once, then they were nice for about a week) and they just sent me a bottle of wine that retails for $1.99. Classic...:)

In other news, Monkey loves the pink fluffy bed she received as her late Christmas present...

Labels: Business, Funny

And no, I'm like totally not even talking about just the color...Pink the singer, silly. Teehee...

Seriously though, what a hilarious video.

Labels: Celebrities, Funny, Videos

Since yesterday was Mardi Gra and my friends were talking about all the boobs they had seen, I think it's time to discuss good boobs vs. bad boobs. I spend a lot of time editing photos of half naked women, so I have seen my fair share of boobies, both good and bad, and I feel that I am somewhat a Breast Expert. That's right, you must bow before my knowledge of boobs. Plus I have a set of my very own...Any how, lets start with:

Bad Boobs

This poor girl. She's so pretty, obviously really young and has a horrible boob job. Her new boobs are 3" too low, too far apart, at least a cup size too big for her frame and her nipples are staring off into space. $5,000 not very well spent.


Ouch!! I would be afraid to even touch these hound dogs! I don't even need to point out how wrong these breast implants are, on so many levels.


Yep. Even guys can have bad boobs. And I don't mean "bad" as in "good", either. I hope this guy wears a sports bra when he runs. Oh wait, he obviously doesn't run. hmm.


Not only does this chick, Catherine Bosley, have a yucky yucky boob job, she was also a news anchor in Youngstown who decided to get completely naked in a wet t-shirt contest. Great idea! She resigned once these pictures and the video surfaced. Any how, back to how bad her boobs are...Oh wait, you can see for yourself. GROSS!


This chick somehow managed to work out enough to have really big man pecs and then decided to implant boobs underneath them?! Looks pretty strange to me, but okee dokee...


This is not a natural shape for a boob. This isn't even a natural shape for fake boobs! Why the hell is your boob flat on one side? Perhaps she had them propped up on a table top for too long or something...yuck.


Okay, apparently even skeletons are good candidates for breast implants! At 1st I felt bad because I thought that perhaps this women had some sort of medical condition. But then I thought about it and I know if I looked like this, I wouldn't go out in public so scantily dressed (I wouldn't do it anyways, but perhaps that's just me...).

So there you have it. Bad boobs. Horrible, yucky boobs. Why, oh why, would someone pay a plastic surgeon thousand of dollars to look like this?! I don't get it t all. Small boobs are WAY better then fake, round, plastic-feeling balls stuck on your chest. Small boobies are actually cute, but you know what they say, "The grass is always greener..."

Now, on to:

Good Boobs

This girl has perfect boobs. Perfecty in preportion to her body. Does she need a big rack hanging off of her chest to be sexy? Not bloody likely! (By the way, if you like her star pasties, you can score a pair at LaLaLingerie.com.)


This is a picture of porn queen Savannah and although her boobs are fake, they are definately good boobs. They fit her body and are perky without being too round.


Mmmmmm. Pizza! And good boobs too!


WOW! Look at that cleavage. Oh wait...that's a babies butt...hmmm. I think I might be getting tired. Good night!

Oh, and the moral of the story is: You don't need fake tits to be sexy. But, if you choose to get a boob job, do your research and find a genuinely talented plastic surgeon, not some hack handing out coupons in the paper.

Labels: Boobs, Funny